Jan. 9 2012

IDEAS 4 BLOG

+ wicked pics of me wearing a variety of fun outfits with my DOC MARTENS (best christmas present EVER from my dad :)

+ write a page a day towards a book about finding my place in the world

+ post pics of cool graffiti inspired artwork (made with found objects-garbage)

icant type too well cuz i did my nails all long and fabulus...so its a damn slow process...i had the best night ever chillin with my family..my brother graduated today ..he has a bachelor of science..so stoked for him and accomplishing the intense feat of completing a 4 year degree,, something i never did..but we all have our own paths..i met a girl tonight that inspired me..my long lost cousin! stoked on the fact that i've established a relationship with her. she is memorable..she will be a famous actress;)

i miss the bookstore

so i work in a mall on a shitty boring street that i've tried to find beauty in. but simply cannot.

malls are gross because they have no personality, they are VOID. giant mutes . they don't make you feel anything at all. the stores are all in a row. and its very suburban, even in the middle of a city. the outside world doesn't exist in a mall. i never even shopped in malls before i worked in one. they are soul sucking. and i miss the bookstore. polo park mall has no bookstore. and that makes me so sad.

list

so i decided a few weeks ago. that all the things i want to do are achievable and within reach. and there is no way that i can go on much longer living in a state of "wish"

wish is a place with no satisfaction. no outcome. "wish" hurts because it never ends. if one continues to "wish" one is never actually DOING. so i made an agreement with myself that i would DO. so the other night i was able to make some headway with my music, and found a sound that i like and feel really is me.. and i'm gonna play a show if it fucking kills me. cuz if i don't then psychologically i am dead. so why the hold up? work is sucking out my creative self. too many sales, too much business zapps everything free flowing and natural and turns you into a machine. that is a laughing shmoozing smooooth operator.

style is everything. friends that truly understand you are everything.